Bills Game 11/30/08

We went to the Bills game a couple weeks ago. They played a horrible game against the 49ers. I have now vowed not to go back to a game until two conditions are met: girly girl JP Losman is no longer on our team and we are at least winning games. Those things have not happened and I will not return to the Ralph until they do. But we had a good time tailgating in the 28 degree weather...

Ah, a nice 28 degrees.

It was dip day. I made my specialty 7 layer bean dip.

Look at those layers! Perfect.

Yep, that's me. Don't worry, I had on some thermals, a pair of sweatpants, a pair of waterproof pants, another shirt, a turtle neck, a long sleeve shirt, my down feather coat, a scarf, a hat, gloves, three pairs of socks and some waterproof boots. I was sweating!

James was dancing to stay warm. Stupid him only wore jeans, a shirt, a jacket and a coat.

My friend Rick, he claimed these were keeping his nose warm. And that porn-stache was for the disco the night before.

Little James was so tired when we got home.

Matches

Here is a little story about what you should do with matches after they are lit. A little background to this story is that I gave James "special" fart matches for Christmas as a joke.

Last night when James came home from work he needed to "sit in his office" as he calls it. He gets his new, special matches out of his stocking and goes into the bathroom. I go upstairs to put on some sweatpants to get ready for our Wii party. When I come back downstairs, James had finished in his office and I smelled something burning. Here is the rest of our conversation:

Brooke: What's burning?

James: I lit a match out here to burn a candle.

Brooke: Oh, ok. It smells funny, not like a candle.

James: It might be my fart matches, maybe they have a special scent to cover my stench.

Brooke: It's probably toxic and we will die from the fumes.

(About 2-3 minutes pass by)

Brooke: Do you smell something burning? It smells funny.

James: My matches smell like inscents.

Brooke: Hmm, I don't think so.

(As I'm walking to the bathroom, smoke is filling the kitchen and it's coming from underneath the bathroom door. I open the bathroom door and smoke is every where. There is a small flame in the garbage can.)

Brooke: Holy shit! The garbage can is on fire!

(I grab the garbage to run outside with it. James comes running and takes the garbage can outside and puts snow in it. I start fanning the kitchen so the obnoxious, industrial strength smoke alarm doesn't go off. James comes back in.)

Brooke: What the F**k is wrong with you?! Who puts matches in the garbage can?! Why did you not put it in the toilet stupid?!

James: I always do that.

Brooke: And what matches smell like inscents, dummy?

James: Ones that cover farts.

Brooke: I'm going to kill you.

(I open the sliding glass door and the front door to let the house air out.)

James: It's cold in here.

Brooke: No shit. I'm going to make you go stand outside in it. And you always put the matches in the garbage can?

James: Yeah.

Brooke: It's probably best that you don't do that anymore.

James: I agree.

Hap, Happy, Happy New Year!!

Happy New Year's everyone!! In the new year I hope for world peace, the end of snow, a good trip to the Dominican, a win for UB and a win for the Utes. Let's go Bulls, Let's go Utes!

This sucks.

So there is a "Winter Storm Warning" out there right now. We are supposed to get 6-12" in the next 6 hours. My office is closing at 1pm which is awesome. And all my friends are teachers and they got a snow day, awesome again. But no one wants to drive anywhere to hang out since it's so crappy out. That's why this sucks. Now I have to go home and actually do laundry and clean. Or I might just sit on my fat ass and watch Christmas movies. We'll see how this pans out when I get home. Let's all hope that this storm has passed through Buffalo and Chicago by Sunday which is when I am scheduled to fly to Utah. And by the time I get home, my snowplow man better have plowed my driveway because there is no way in hell I am going outside to shovel.

This is the view outside my window at work.

Read 'em and weep

I just got my grades back for this past semester. As you can see below I got straight A's or what some people like to call a 4.0 GPA. It was only three classes, but so what, an A is an A. Plus Corporate Finance was not the easiest class, but I maybe a genius compared to the rest of the population at my ghetto school. Boo Yeah Bitches!

What I've learned

While living here in the Northeast during winter, I've learned a few things. I will share:

1: The weather man is never right, always look outside before going anywhere.

2: Buy a car starter. When it's 2 degrees you won't want to go outside to start your car.

3: Remember to set your heater to on and to the vents that will defrost your window, otherwise your car starter is useless.

4: Have a good pair of winter boots. Not ones with heels or anything like that. Ones that are water proof and you can get dirty. Wear them to work and bring shoes to change. Otherwise you will fall on your ass walking into work in your heels.

5: Always layer your clothing. The cold air goes through your clothes. If you layer enough, the air won't feel like it's freezing you to the bone and you feel like you want to die.

6: Wear a scarf. It helps so the cold air doesn't hit where your clothes and coat don't cover and then you feel like you want to die.

7: Have gloves. Your hands will be so cold that you can't open doors or you feel like they are going to fall off.

8: During the winter you need to wake up earlier than usual because you will need to clean the snow off your car. Don't be that asshole that drives down the road with snow still on their car that's flying onto other cars.

9: If it's snowing or there is snow on the ground, I will be driving slow, don't ride my ass.

10: It is possible for it to snow 6" in 8 hours.

11: Don't put your coffee mug on top of your car when there is ice up there. It will fall off and spill all over your black pants and new red coat.

12: Buy a long coat. It will help with the layering on your legs. That way you won't feel all warm up top with all the layers and your bottom half feels like you are frozen.

13: Always wear a hat. When that wind blows your head and your ears you will feel like you want to die.

14: Buy gloves that are half glove, half mitten. And have the fingers in the glove cut off so that you can still do stuff without taking your gloves off. I call these circumcised gloves.

15: Always buy a coat with a hood. Why would you not have a hood? It protects the back of your neck from the death cold.

Needless to say, winter makes me feel like I want to die. The air here is so humid that it chills you to the bone when it is cold. The wind will go right through your clothes.

My new favorite website

So I don't know where I found this website, but it is amazing. It's called Graph Jam. You can look at other people's graphs or you can make your own. I've made a few graphs in my day but here are some of my favs.

This one is self explanatoryLori is my co-worker who likes to talk about her kids' poop

Hank is my sister's dog. He's kind of a jerk.

Jane is my other co-worker who annoys the piss out of me.

Sugar Bowl here we come!

No, not me personally, here we come. I'm talking about the Utes! We made it to the Sugar Bowl! This is very exciting. I wish I could make it to New Orleans to watch but airfare is $400 and that is a bit steep for a weekend trip. My dad is going with Elizabeth and I'm very jealous. Instead I've decided to join my peeps heading up to Toronto to watch the University of Buffalo play in the International Bowl the same weekend. It should be a great game. It's at the Roger's Centre where the Blue Jay's play, and sometimes that silly Bills team that I am no longer associated with since that girl JP Losman is playing. But any who. It's a dome and I've never been to a football game indoors, it will be interesting. I've even booked us in the Reniassance Inn which is in the Roger's Centre. I wanted the rooms that have a view to the field but $389 a night didn't seem worth it. Toronto is such an awesome city and I would want to spend the weekend but our friend Stevie will be in town so we have to come home the day of the game. So look for me on TV!!

Some Sabres fun and Thanksgiving

For Eron's birthday we bought him and Rachel some tickets to see the Sabres game while they were here. They just so happened to be in the first row right behind the penalty box. They were amazing seats. We got to see a couple players in the penalty box and even two players talking shit to each other through the penalty boxes, it was awesome.

At Pearl Street Grill before the game

Rachel, Eron and James

Opening face off and it's so close!

Eron and Rachel

James and Brooke

On Thanksgiving, Rachel came over to help me cook for the "wedding present" we were giving to Paul and Linda. It went quite well for my first cooking of Thanksgiving. There were no burns, no cuts and everything was edible! We were only about 45 minutes late serving and I had to run to the grocery store for a new can opener when mine broke trying to make green bean casserole. I ended up serving some acorn squash, potatoes gratin, Rachel Ray's Apple and Onion Stuffin', Big Martha's Mashed Potatoes, green bean casserole and some rolls. It was fantastic and delicious. The days of hockey puck hamburgers are over! I can cook!

James is being a man and putting together our two new chairs so everyone could sit at the table

Our cute Turkey Nameplates

James trying to put EJ's shoes on, it's not going well

Paul taking a nap after dinner

A wedding to remember....

How do you even begin this? James's parents were married this past Tuesday. Yes, his mother and father have never been married to each other, nor have they lived together up until 6 months ago. They have been dating for 28 years, which I'm pretty sure is a world record. I even researched it but couldn't come up with anything. I don't know the specifics of why they never married (I heard that James's dad never asked and his mom never brought it up, which is lame). The only reason they are getting married now is so that his mom can be on his dad's insurance policy because he has cancer. Yep, good reason.

It was at a "church" about 10 minutes from our house. By "church" I mean something like the Chapel of Love in Las Vegas, where they don't actually perform any sermons or spiritual meetings. We arrived about a half hour before the "ceremony". As I walked in I was handed some flowers, which I thought were because I'm "family" (not really though), because Rachel (James's sister-in-law) was handed some too. We are just standing around chatting and then Linda (the "bride") says it's time to start and that me and Rachel should go to the front. I think to myself "The front, where? She better not mean the front where the wedding party stands" Sure enough that's what she means. So I'm walking to the front, slowly, and Rachel pushes me in front of her and says I'm the maid of honor. I say to Rachel "No, I am not." She says "Yes you are, because I don't want to be". I say "I'm going to kill you" and she pushes me again. By this time, it's too late, I have to stop arguing because they are coming down the aisle.

I'm pretty sure it's customary for normal people to ask a person to be their maid of honor, or bridesmaid, before they arrive at the church and are given flowers. This was not the case. I was never asked, nor thanked for being in the wedding. I find the whole situation bizarre and I felt like I was in the twilight zone for a good portion of the evening.

He's excited for his parents to get married, can't you tell?

Fun before the wedding The "chapel" Eron, the happy couple, James