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Kenny Ketchup

I told you about Kenny Ketchup a couple weeks ago. He's the guy at the Bills tailgating that likes to have ketchup squirted all over him... You can't get to close to the action or you will get ketchup all over you but I got just close enough on Sunday to take a video.

So here's the video. It starts off when Kenny comes out of his van with a hamburger bun and people are already on top of the van ready to go. So when he comes out he holds the bun up and says "I would like some ketchup". And the people on top say "What?" and this continues until he screams that he would like some ketchup. Then they get out ketchup bottles and squirt him. It's all very weird. But it seems to get the crowd all rilled up and ready to go for the game. It happens at exactly 11:30 every week. It's like a sign that it's almost time to go into the game. This ketchup debacle continues until the ketchup is all over Kenny and then they squirt him with mustard. I have no idea how he cleans up before the game. I can't stick around that long, I dry-heave and you will see why in the pictures below....

The people on top of the van.

Kenny after the ketchup shower.

My good Italian friend, Jimmy C

Me and my bff's Kristin and Corinne

Me and Corinne at our seats.

Brooke and Kristin's B-Day Trip!!!

It's official, me and my bff Kristin are going to the Dominican Republic in February. It just so happens to be in between our birthday's so we have decided to call it our birthday trip. I just want to give a shout out to my aunt Suzy who works at Jet Blue and put up with our crap about which places we wanted to go and our "bugeting" problems. She is awesome!! We are going to an all inclusive resort called Barcelo Talanquera for 5 days. It's right on the beach and they have a spa and 3 adult pools. It will be amazing.

Our resort....

The beach...

The patio at the hotel...

Bernard

James has been developing a "zit" on his forehead. And I say "zit" because it keeps growing and growing and it looks like it's developing into it's own little person up there. Well when I get zits like that I name them. Like last week I had one that I named Ricard. When James got one this week, I named it Bernard. (I had been watching Old School) So James is already upset with me because I keep calling it Bernard, but that's just what I do. But then I'm so mean and I start refering to Bernard as a real person. Such as: "Well let's ask Bernard what he thinks", "Does Bernard know where I put my tweezers", or "I think you need to wash Bernard with my Clinique astringent stuff". I'm not sure why, but I think I am damn funny and I will laugh hysterically after I make a joke about Bernard. In fact, I am trying to hold in laughter right now since I am writing this from my cube. I'm just wondering why I'm so mean, but I think it's so funny. I probably think it's more funny because this week he has a little person growing on his face and I don't. And now, considering my karma, I'll probably get cold sore or something.

FYI

Just in case anyone was wondering, Tide To Go does not work on huge coffee stains on white shirts. I found this out this morning when I spilled my delicious home made coffee all over my desk, chair, shirt and floor. It wasn't pretty. There was just too much of the stain for the Tide To Go to handle. I don't think it was designed to be able to fix spills more than 4" by 6".

Not a good picture but I think you can see the stain. Craptastic.

James is not happy that he has to bring me a new shirt to wear.

What the hell is the matter with people?

I was at Tops Friendly Market doing some shopping this morning and as I come out of the store I hear a very familiar car alarm going off. Since I have a remote car starter, the remote is on my key chain. The remote starts beeping hysterically which tells me it's my car alarm that's going off. As I look toward my car I see a man frantically trying to get in to his f-ing van and he starts to back out and drive away. So I hurry over to my car to see a huge gouge in my car door. Yeah, he hit my car hard enough with his door that it set my alarm off and then he drove away. But I didn't think he was going to come back and apologize after the profanity that was spewing out of my mouth at a volume where everyone in the parking lot heard me and was staring. And believe me, he heard me. The passenger window was open and the passenger turned around just in time to see my middle finger up in the air. Which leads me to the question, What the hell is the matter with people?

Let's Go Bills, Let's Go Bills, ba ba ba Bills

The Bills home opener was this past Sunday. It's one of the games we are going to this year. I'm a baby when it comes to the cold so I wanted to get tickets to the first couple games because I knew it would still be warm. But it was not warm. We woke up at 6am to make it to Kristin's by 7am cause the tailgate lot opens at 8am. It was only 58 degrees when we woke up. I wanted to wear long pants and a long sleeve t-shirt but James advised me not to, cause apparently he thinks he's Al Roker.

We made it to the tailgate lot early and had to wait in line so we got out of the car and it was super cold. We finally made it inside the lot and set up shop. Me and Kristin like to read the paper in our Bills fold out chairs so we did that for a while. At 11:30 we went and watched the first "Ketchup-ing of the year" from Kenny Ketchup. It's this crazy old guy, Kenny, and his friend, I don't know his name, and they have a pinto that they tow around and cook on. He's been in Sports Illustrated a couple times. Anyway, they have this van that a couple of their friends stand on and Kenny and his friend come out of the van with hamburgers and a bun and they ask for ketchup. Their friends end up squirting like 4 bottles of ketchup and mustard on them. It's actually kind of gross, but when you are there watching it's super funny. And if any of the opposing team's fans are around, the Bills fans push them into the circle and they squirt them with ketchup too. I don't take my camera over by them because I don't want to get ketchup and mustard on it.

Our seats for the game were awesome. They were in the lower bowl on the 12th row near the Rock Pile endzone. The Rock Pile is a crazy section were people usually end up getting into fights because thats the first place that the opposing team can get tickets. We made some new friends in the seats around us. We are going to have the same seats for the 49ers game when I can see the love of my life Alex Smith, even though he's on the injured list. The Rosco Parrish touchdown and the (booo BYU) Ryan Denney touchdown were in our endzone.

Before the game started they did a tribute to Tim Russert because he was from Buffalo and was a huge Bills fan. And yes, I cried, and yes James made fun of me. Also, Kevin Everett was there and he walked onto the field. He was injured in last season's home opener and was paralized and they never thought he would walk again. But Ralph Wilson, the owner of the Bills, has funded research for a procedure that the doctors do within a half hour of the person having a spine injury and it obviously heals them. So luckily they did that on the field and he's almost fully recovered. And yes, I cried again. It was a good game and the Bills won 34-10. It's the first home opener they've won since 2005. I thought the city was going to burn down. If they make the playoffs I'm sure buildings and cars will be set on fire in a riot.

Yes, that's a sweatshirt. Don't wear long sleeves my ass.

Our walk into the game

The field from our seats. My season tickets were in the same spot just on the other side of the field.

One of our new friends, even though I don't remeber his name.

This kid tripped up the stairs just as I was taking pictures, ha ha ha. It's only a matter of time before I do that.

The Tim Russert tribute. You can't really tell but it's a clip of him wearing a Bills jersey on Meet the Press.

Kevin Everett on the field.

Brooke and James after the game. It poured on us for 3 quarters of the game.

The Ryan Denney touchdown clip - this is for you Andrew and your damn BYU. Ugh. I actually threw a fit in the stadium because he was the one who scored and I started to yell how much I hated BYU.

James after the game. Finally, a normal picture where he doesn't have his mouth open with a look of surprise.

My friends made the front page of the Buffalo News. They are the ones holding the flag. I had season tickets with them last year. Damn it. I could have been on the front page.

Utah in the Big House

That's right, Utah kicked Michigan's ass. Well it was an ass kicking until the 4th quarter when we were up by 15 and then they came back with 13 points. But, whew, we still won by 2 points. And that even covered the spread so I win $25. Nice.

The weekend started off pretty good when I left work at noon on Friday. I noticed how dirty my car was so I stopped and washed and vacuumed it, even though I was going to be driving and bugs would get all over it. So I'm anal. I left my house about 2pm and got to the Canadia boarder at 2:30 where I proceeded to wait for 30 minutes while all the stupid Canucks in front of me had to go through. It took me until 6:30 to get to the Michigan boarder, where I again waited at the frickin boarder for 45 minutes. Fabuloso. I met my dad, Greg, Alex and Abby out for pizza since I was so late getting there.

Saturday morning we got up and left for Ann Arbor about 12:30, which is an hour away. We got there and it was complete chaos. All of downtown Ann Arbor, which is where the stadium is, is all houses full of college kids. The lawns and streets were packed with people. It was crazy. We went to Greg's nephew's house and got some pretty evil looks from all the students. We walked to the stadium about 2:30 and it took us an hour to get to our seats. The Big House is really intimidating. It holds 108,500 people. But they all sit on benches, which sucks. They were kind enough to provide the Crimson Club with seats in rows 90-97. Jerks. Some how some annoying, fat, ugly girls got seats right in the middle of the Utah fans. They were pretty annoying even though they were losing most of the game. But in the end they finally shut up. It was an awesome game. If you don't know the score it was Utah 25 Michigan 23. I did not get to rush the field, the security was right there to go to the lower seats. Gay! Then on the way back to the car there was a Michigan heckler that kept yelling at all the Utah fans. It was stuff like F Utah, F the mormons, F Warren Jeffs, F Karl Malone. Although he did a pretty good Karl Malone impression, I was still getting angry. We were standing on the corner waiting for Greg and we had to walk past this ugly red head to get to the car. So when we walked by he said something about Warren Jeffs, blah blah, and my dad yells that he's from Arizona. Well I felt the need to follow it up with "Warren Jeffs isn't even a mormon, dumb ass. Nor is he from Utah". Daddy did not like that and I believe his exact words were "Shut the hell up, don't say anything". Ha ha, he knows I can't keep my mouth shut. That was the only mean heckler. The rest we just joked around with. I may have told one kid to keep his eyes on his own shirt cause he kept looking at mine.

Sunday we just hung out and had a BBQ with Alex's parents. They were funny. Big Al and Prissy. Ha ha. Monday I drove back to Buffalo through Canadia again. There was no wait for the bridge going into Canadia but when I got to the Peace Bridge in Buffalo there was a 45 minute wait which turned into an hour and a half wait. I was a pretty big bitch to the boarder patrol and he let me go with two questions. I hate that they have to ask you questions like, where are you going, where have you been, are you going to make stops in Canadia, blah blah blah. I always tell them I'm going to stop to use the facilities but they never think it's funny. The drive through Canadia is mostly very boring. I don't like doing it but I wasn't going to pay $500 to fly an hour and a half to Detroit. Here are some pictures of my fabtabulous weekend!

I got stopped right at the International Boarder on the Sarnia Bridge into Michigan. PS the bridge sways as cars go across. I thought the bridge was going to collapse and I about shit my pants.

My Dad and Greg at Tim's house.

Me and Pappy. He's really excited.

Ann Arbor craziness

Walking into the stadium

The stadium from the outside. 75% of the stadium is below street level. It's weird.

The Big House

Brooke and Dad

The Crimson Club

Swoop!

These boys came up from the lower bowl to "lead us in a cheer". ha ha.

Scoreboard bitches.

I tried to get down there, damn those security personnel.

Brooke and Dad after the game

I got stopped at the International Boarder again on a different bridge!

Good Ole Hike Skool Tag

1. Did you date someone from your school? Unfortunately, yes and he turned out to be an enormous ass, but luckily that led me to Jimmy Jam.

2. What kind of car did you drive? the Tin Can (89 Sentra) and Big Green (95 Mazda) - I think it's funny we all name our cars, ha ha

3. What was the most embarrassing moment of HS? There were many. But the one coming to mind is when I was nominated for Sweethearts Queen and I had to stand on stage while people bid on the cake I made (which was NASCAR for some reason) and I think it was Casey Alexander and Blake Q-bush who kept bidding on it. Then the fact that I lost was also embarrassing.

4. Were you a party animal? I was very hyper if that counts. We had a lot of parties.

5. Were you considered a flirt? I don't know. I guess if I was a flirt I didn't mean to be.

6. Were you in band, orchestra, or choir? Nope. Can't sing or play instruments.

7. Were you a nerd? A nerd in the sense I graduated with high honors, but I was not a nerd "socially".

8. Were you on any varsity teams? I was on the Drill Team Managers Varsity Team. Which meant I just got to go with the Drill Team to competitions and watch, not actually dance.

9. Did you get suspended/expelled? I was threatened with suspension for my attendance record. Ha ha. Too many tardies and absences.

10. Can you still sing the fight song? Um, um... no. I can't even think of the tune.

11. Who were your favorite teachers? Mrs Bridges, Mr Hill, Mr Howden...

12. Where did you sit during lunch? In the hall across from the cafeteria or we went out to eat. But on Thursday's I ate in the Cafeteria for Mashed Potato Thursday. It was goood!!!

13. School mascot? Lions!! Whoot Whoot!!

14. Did you go to homecoming, and with who? I'm such a loser, I didn't go to homecoming until my senior year and it was with the aforementioned ass, KC.

15. If you could go back and do it again, would you? Um, maybe parts of it. Like hanging out with my friends all day but maybe not other people who made high school stupid.

16. What do you remember most about graduation? Not wanting to go to BYU, wanting to wear a big red U on my hat, the door of Brian's van falling off the van in the parking lot, pictures, and dinner with the fam.

17. Where did you go senior skip day? Did we have an "official" skip day? Clearly I was probably already skipping school.

18. Were you in any clubs? National Honor Society, Future Business Leaders of America - that didn't last long.

19. Have you gained some weight since then? Yes, but we will not go into details of how much, I'll attribute it to my thyroid problem.

20. Who was your prom date? Again, I was a loser and didn't go until my senior year and it was with KC.

21. Are you planning on going to your 10 year reunion? I'd rather just call the people I actually like and want to see and hang out.

22. Looking back, what advice would you give yourself? Be more outgoing, don't care about what other people think, maybe go to class more (even though I'm clearly a genius and don't need to).